Flash Gordon - The Quotes

Sure, Flash Gordon was a campy movie in a lot of ways.  But then again, so was the series which it was trying to stay more-or-less true to.  And it did have some great soundtrack music, courtesy of Queen, not to mention some good performances put in by Max von Sydow, Timothy Dalton, Richard O'Brian, and Brian Blessed.

Seeing a line from a movie you enjoy always brings back fond memories of it.  But actually hearing the line(s) being spoken by the people who performed the roles is much better, don't you think? :-)  Here is a selection of quotes taken from the movie.  Unless otherwise noted, these .wav files were all recorded as 8-bit samples, mono, at 11KHz.

Select the file name to download and play.


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Bored.wav (530K)
Ming:  Klytus, I'm bored.  What plaything can you offer me today?
Klytus:  An obscure body in the S-K system, your Majesty.  The inhabitants refer to it as the planet... "Earth."
Ming:  How peaceful it looks.
(He activates a console, and watches as earthquakes, floods, etc., start to occur.  They both get a good laugh out of it.)
Klytus:  Most effective, your Majesty.  Will you destroy this, uh, "Earth?"
Ming:  Later.  I like to play with things a while.  Before annihilation....

Theme.wav (750K)
(Beginning of the title theme song.)

WereMoving.wav (253K)
Zarkov:  Sit down!  Keep your foot on that red pedal or the G-forces will kill us all!
Dale:  My God, we're moving!
Zarkov:  For God's sake, strap yourselves down, quick!

HaltLizard.wav (146K)
Orb:  Halt Lizard Man, escape is impossible.  Surrender.  *zap* Prisoners, now follow me to the presence of Emperor Ming.

Psycho.wav (104K)
Flash:  This Ming's a psycho.
Orb:  This Ming is a psycho.
Klytus:  Who said that?
Orb:  The fair-haired prisoner.

Pathetic.wav (180K)
Ming:  Pathetic Earthlings.  Hurling your bodies out into the void - without the slightest inkling of who or what is out here.  If you had known anything about the true nature of the universe - anything at all - you would have hidden from it in terror.

Sensational.wav (42K)
Dale:  What happened to me?
Flash:  I don't know, but it was pretty sensational.

RightPills.wav (216K)
Ming:  Klytus! Are your men on the right pills?  Maybe you should execute their trainer.

LyingBitch.wav (134K)
Aura:  Fly back to your people.  You may see me sooner than you think.
Barin:  Lying bitch.

Tears.wav (146K)
Aura:  Look!  Water is leaking from her eyes.
Ming:  It's what they call tears.  It's a sign of their weakness.

EmptyMind.wav (1M)
Ming:  Every thousand years, I test each life system in the universe.  I visit it with mysteries: Earthquakes, unpredicted eclipses, strange craters in the wilderness.  If these are taken as natural, I judge that system ignorant and harmless; I spare it.  But if the hand of Ming is recognized in these events, I judge that system dangerous to us.  I call upon the great God, Daizan, and for his greater glory - and our mutual pleasure - I destroy it, utterly.
Zarkov:  You're saying... it's my fault Earth is being destroyed?
Ming:  Precisely, doctor.  I thought it might amuse you to know this, before your mind is gone.  (To Klytus) Proceed with it.
Zarkov:  What are you doing to me?
Klytus:  Hmm?  Oh, we're just emptying your mind.
Zarkov:  What??
Kala:  We are going to empty your memory, as we might empty your pockets... doctor.

ShowedPromise.wav (82K)
(They're in the process of draining Zarkov's mind, watching his memories on the monitor screen.  They get to a memory of WWII and Hitler....)
Klytus:  Hmm....  Now HE showed promise!

TeamUp.wav (241K)
Aura:  Every moon of Mongo is a kingdom.  My father keeps them fighting each other constantly.  It's a really brilliant strategy.
Flash:  Why don't they team up and overthrow him?
Aura:  "Team up?"  What does that mean?
Flash:  Maybe I'll show you sometime.

AgentZarkov.wav (143K)
Klytus:  What is your name?
Zarkov:  Han Zarkov.
(Klytus and Kala look at each other.  Han suddenly realizes he gave the wrong answer.)
Zarkov:  Agent Zarkov, number two-one-double-three, of the imperial anti-insurgent espionage group.  Hail Ming!
Klytus: (Looks at Kala, satisfied.)  Good.

GordonsAlive.wav (306K)
Klytus:  I have located Dale Ardon; she's under the guidance of agent Zarkov.  But Flash Gordon... is still alive.
Ming:  ALIVE???
Kala:  He was revived by a traitor, and spirited from the city.  We know this from the Earth girl.
Ming:  What traitor?
Klytus:  I have my suspicions, but I need your authority to pursue them - my way.
Ming:  Stop at nothing.
Klytus:  No matter to whom the trail leads?
Ming:  I said at NOTHING!

Torture.wav (946K)
("The trail" has led Klytus to Aura....)
Klytus:  Your lover, Barin, is harboring Gordon in Arboria, is he not?
Aura:  No!
Klytus:  This lying is such a waste of time!
Kala:  You left with a pilot, and returned alone.  Wasn't he Gordon in disguise?
Aura:  No!!
Klytus:  Who do you imagine you're protecting?  The Imperial Surgeon, who revived Gordon in his tomb?  Another lover of yours?!?
Aura:  Your jealousy of me has made you mad!
Klytus: (To one of his agents, nearby)  Seize the Imperial Surgeon on suspicion of treason.
Aura:  You're mad!
Klytus: (To another nearby agent)  Prepare her for torture!
Kala:  Confess, and we won't hurt you anymore.  We don't like doing this at all.
Aura:  Never!
Klytus:  Bring me... the bore worms.
Aura:  No! Not the bore worms!
(Even Kala looks a bit taken aback, briefly.  She goes to a nearby table, and returns with a container....)
Aura:  I am a Princess of the Blood, Klytus.  My father will have your head for this.  I swear!  He'll execute your whole perverted secret police force!  I demand to see him!!
Klytus:  With pleasure.... (He goes to a control panel and activates a control, revealing that Ming has been in a side chamber, observing the whole time.)
Aura:  Father....
Klytus:  The traitor is close to confession, Your Majesty.  Should we stop the torture?
Ming:  No.
Aura:  Father!  Damn you, father!!

NiceConfession.wav (507K)
(Ming reads over the confession that Klytus has presented to him.)
Ming:  Nice confession.  I commend you.
Klytus:  Execute her?
Ming:  Nooo... too kind.  Aura will be banished to Fridgia the day after my wedding.  One year in a cavern of ice will cool her blood.  And then... who knows?  Perhaps We will marry her to someone... worthy of her treacherous nature.
Klytus:  Your Majesty!  How can I express my gratitude?
Ming:  Easily, Klytus.  Get me Gordon and Barin.
Klytus:  With pleasure.

14Hours.wav (128K)
Dale:  Flash!  Flash!  Flash, I love you!  But we only have 14 hours to save the Earth!  Flash!

KeepWord.wav (260K)
(Aura tries to convince Dale to poison Ming....)
Aura:  Drop this into his glass tonight.
Dale:  I can't, Aura.  I gave your father my word of honor.
Aura:  What word?
Dale:  To try and be a good wife, if he'd spare Zarkov and Barin.  He vowed he would.
Aura:  My father has never kept a vow in his life!
Dale:  I can't help that. Keeping our word is one of the things that makes us better than you.

Ajax.wav (576K)
Guard:  General Kala, Flash Gordon approaching.
Kala:  What do you mean, "Flash Gordon approaching?"
Guard:  On a Hawkman rocket cycle.  Shall I inform His Majesty?
Kala:  Imbecile!  The emperor would shoot you, for interrupting his wedding with this news.  Fire when Gordon's in range.
(City defenses fire on Flash, until he turns around.)
Kala:  He's escaping, idiot!  Dispatch War Rocket Ajax!  To bring back his body!

Dive.wav (276K)
Flash:  Biro's hit! I'm going in after him.
Vultan:  Impetuous boy!  Oh well, who wants to live forever?  DIVE!!

Zeeman.wav (67K)
(Zarkov successfully "picks" the electronic lock of a door....)
Zarkov:  A-ha!  I thought it was one of the prime numbers of the Zeeman series.  I haven't changed!

Anthem.wav (679K)
Flash:  Level with me, Vultan.  Will this do it?
Vultan:  Yes, no doubt. There's a lightning field across the entrance.  When this baby hits it, boom! All the fuel and everything, it will blow that field dead.  My hawkmen fly right in.  Now, let's see what Mingo City's saying....
(Tunes into the city radio station, only to hear the wedding anthem playing....)
Flash: Oh my God....

Ajax2.wav (329K)
Guard:  Rocket Ajax returning.
Kala:  With Gordon's body?
Guard:  I presume so.  Communications are off for some reason.
Kala:  Are they in the proper approach pattern for today?
Guard:  Negative.  They are not.
Kala:  Open fire.
Guard:  On Ajax General??
Kala:  OPEN FIRE!  All weapons!  Now!!  Charge the lightning field.  I take personal responsibility, in the emperor's name.

Wedding.wav (335K)
Priest:  Do you, Ming the Merciless, Ruler of the Universe, take this Earthling, Dale Ardon, to be your empress of the hour?
Ming:  Of the hour, yes.
Priest:  Do you promise to use her as you will?
Ming:  Certainly.
Priest:  Not to blast her into space? (Gets a strange look from Ming.)  Uh, until you grow weary of her?
Ming:  I do.
Dale:  I do not!

Ending.wav (851K)
Vultan: Look out, Flash!
Dale:  Flash!  Don't move!  Stay where you are!
Orb:  Long live Flash, you've saved your Earth.  Have a nice day.
Flash:  YEAH!
Vultan:  Barin is the rightful heir!
Crowd:  Hail Barin, King of Mongo!
Barin:  We owe everything to Flash.
Crowd:  Hail Flash!
Barin:  We appoint Vultan general of Our armies.
Crowd: (Cheers)
Barin:  From this day on, let every breed of Mongo live together, in peace.
Crowd: (Cheers)  Hail Barin!
Dale:  Will we ever get out of here, Han?
Zarkov:  I don't know, but we'll try.
Barin:  We certainly invite you all to stay.
Flash: (to Dale)  What do you think?
Dale:  I'm a New York city girl. It's a little too quiet around here for me....

 

This page maintained by David Guntner. Spelling (or other) corrections cheerfully accepted. :-)  Yes, the web counter number at the bottom of the page is real, and has not been fudged.  I've had this page for a long time... :-)  (The number would be even higher, except that my domain was unhosted (except for E-Mail) for a couple of years.)

I'm considering converting these wave files to mp3 format to save space (and save you some download time :).  I'd love to hear your thoughts on this, if you have any!  Would you prefer to see them stay as they are, or converted to mp3?  Send me a message and let me know.

A neat page with Flash Gordon stuff on it is The Unofficial Flash Gordon Movie Page.  You might want to turn off JavaScript in your browser before going there, so you don't have to put up with Geocities' lame pop-up ads.

A nice collections of sounds from the movie may be found at the Flash Gordon Soundboard.  Needs flash.  Heh, you need flash to hear Flash.... :-)

A terrific collection of sounds from various movies (unfortunately, it doesn't seem to have a Flash Gordon section anymore) can be found at The Movie Sounds Page.

If you know of other pages devoted to the movie, please let me know!

The bio information provided for the actors mentioned at the beginning of this page were retrieved from The Internet Movie Database, one of the most comprehensive, free, databases for movie information on the Internet.

You can buy the movie at Amazon on Blu-ray or DVD.

The movie and related materials are, of course, copyright 1980 by Universal.  The sound clips here are allowed under the "Fair Use" provisions of the Copyright Act.


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